What is the secret to making a marriage last?

It seems that in every relationship i've been in there is some kind of problem.... becoming too attached...not having enough time for one another... being cheated on...being controlled.... Then i wonder, do all relationships have problems like this that need to be worked on? (less serious than cheating because that is just too much.) ... but besides dealing with these problems what is the secret to making a marraige last? -- how to speed through the bad times and slow down the good.What is the secret to making a marriage last?
You picked someone to marry who wasn't suitable for you, and then wondered why it didn't work? The biggest key to a successful marriage is marrying a person who is both compatible and marriage-ready.





becoming too attached...


Marry someone who is emotionally mature, and don't get married unless you are.





not having enough time for one another...


Make marriage %26amp; family your #1 value, and only marry someone with the same #1 value.





being cheated on...


Marry someone who is honorable, faithful, trustworthy, and self-disciplined.





being controlled....


Marry someone who is emotionally secure, loving, and trusting.What is the secret to making a marriage last?
Prayer, communication, and patience. If you really love somebody and are committed to making the relationship last, you both will give everything you have to make it last. Relationships aren't 50/50, they are 100/100! Both partners have to give 100% of themselves to make it last. It may take a lot of compromise, a lot of soul searching, and some changing but in the long run, it's all worth it. Don't expect for everything to be perfect because it won't. An older married couple told me before I get married that the most important thing to remember is that you do not have to argue. I thought it was bogus at first because I figured everybody argued. But being with my husband these 4 years I have realized that it's true. We never argue now. If we disagree, we talk about it. It's not necessary to be right all the time.
There is no miracle potion, nor drug. I have yet to find the huge secret either. BUT.... what I can tell you what works. Is communication, trust, commitment, loyalty, dedication, honesty, availability, accountability, slow to anger, respect, laughter, appreciation, and most importantly love and forgiveness. AND... easy to apologize when in error.





I find that those traits if you can find in a partner will take you into your GOLDEN years of life that you are seeking.





Again, there is no perfect person but I believe each person should have if not all those traits most of them and be a works in progress to some degree.





Most importantly, make a list of your do's and dont's and deal breakers when dealing with people especially when it pertains to matters of the heart.





Good luck to you





p.s. don't forget to pray too.. for wisdom and understanding when you are selecting a mate.
The secret to making a marriage last is to give your life completely for your partner. I'm not talking about dying for them because in truth that is a lot easier than giving your daily life for them. Make their needs a priority over your own. I've been married for almost 9 yrs. and 18 mo. of that my husband and I were separated. I've learned a lot of valuable information and now we are back together and doing awesome. Yes, it's a struggle sometimes because my selfish nature keep wanting to rear it's ugly head but I just keep reminding myself of how much I love my husband and that he's worth whatever I need to do. You'll find that if you make your spouse a priority, they'll return the favor. It's a natural response. But you can't make it conditional, ';I'll be nice to her/him or they're nice to me'; sort of thing. If you really and truly love your spouse, making them happy will be a joy and make you fell complete just by doing it.
There really is no secret. You just need to trust, communicate, compromise (this is a big one) be patent and love unconditionally. As far as speeding through the bad and slowing down the good? Well, each situation that you go through comes to teach you something about yourself or the other person. How you deal with it will determine whether you will have to repeat it because you didn't learn your lesson.
Respect for the other person. Communication - not the trivial BS that most people do, but really communicating and listening to the other person. The ability to admit when you are wrong. And, you let the other person know that you really love them.





The reason why your relationships don't work out is probably because, either you or your partner haven't learned what it takes to make a relationship work.
i think one of the keys to a marriage is taking the divorce option out of the answers. if you know divorce is always an option then you'll most likely not try as hard because you always have a back up. instead if you take divorce out of your options then you know you either have to work it how and love eachother or be miserable. either way your married so most people would choose to be happy and married. also dont be afraid to seek proffessional help if problems get too much for you guys to handle. they always see problems from an outside perspective and honestly can help a marriage. also communication is the key. if your upset then let your spouse know. hiding it inside just to save a fight doesnt work because at some point the anger will come out and probably at a worse time when there's more problems then just the one. ,last always put your marriage and eachother before anything in the world...except god. even put your spouse before your children. because if your not in a happy marriage it will effect your children. you have to be a good spouse to be a good parent.
Communicate, compromise, don't fight battles not worth winning, each take some time to yourself, and know how to weigh competing desires -- in general (not always), go in the direction of the one who wants it (whatever it is) more. Sort out how to divvy up the household chores most of the time. Stay atop your financial picture.





Be frisky with each other.





And at least one of you should be a decent cook.





A marriage is an ongoing relationship. Sometimes it will demand effort. It'll probably be worth it.
Marriage is like a child....you get a child,,,,,just like when you get a baby and yiu nurture it well...so is marriage and for example if you take care of your baby u know what happens...


So in marriage you have to take care of it...you take care of each other...and give the best...what you think that shall make you and your partner happy...


do your part...unfortunately at times one of us may fail and thats when marriage becomes sour...in that case...only God can intavene


but always pray.
Yes, I agree that marriages encounter many problems. And that gets to the heart of the matter: in order to have a successful marriage, you need to learn how to solve problems. And in order to solve problems, you need to talk and talk and talk some more, explain your feelings and arrive at a compromise. One thing for sure: you will not get your way most of the time. You will have to give up something in order to get something else in return.





Check out my source and learn how compromise works.
definetly prayer. but also having the same vision for you marriage. however all relationships have problems, no two people are 100percent compatable. so you take the good with the bad. you just have to make sure that the other person is someone who is willing to compromise sometimes. can't be right all the time.
i think there is one thing common in all of your relationships, you, maybe you're causing the problems. Just kidding, there are problems in every relationship, fairy tale endings are exactly that, fariy tales. Communication is the key to try and find a happy medium between the fairy tale ending and the pycho ex-wife/girlfriend scenario.
What works for one couple may not be the right formula for someone else.


In our case, we didn't marry while our minds were clouded by love. Yes, we love each other, maybe more so each day, but we married, in our mid/late twenties, as best friends who cared a lot for each other and had known each other, and been occasional lovers, for eight years. We're still best friends, and although the road has had some detours, potholes, and maintenance and upkeep, it's going on 30 years, three daughters, and (so far) a couple of grandchildren.


We did a lot of compromising and I learned, early on, how to say ';Yes dear.'; :-)
people always have problems like these, i think if it happens ocassionally u still have agreat chance if it happens too much, well i dont think you would have a great chance, and kids, oh my gosh belive me, theyll get upset if you fight alot and get scared of being divorced, i had that feeling when i was a kid, still now scared, one night i was real sick i was about 4 years old, and i woke up hearing them argure, my dad was about to leave, luckily we all woke up and supported and he didnt leave, i was just there crying on the bed, b/c i got real scared man, its just upsetting too everyone
Mutual respect is the key, that's what works for my marriage anyway. We're both dedicated to eachother and believe marriage is a covenant and take that seriously.
just talk to each other .. so you know . its thats simple mate .. we have a day a week we just go to the pictures .. and then out to lunch .. and after that we just talk about things we can do better next time .. been married a long time mate . so it must work ..
Men need to be Respected.


And


Woman need to feel that they are loved


So once the man feels that he is respected by his wife he will give the wife what she needs is lots of unconditional Love.
I think it's keeping the reason why you're married in the first place at the front of your mind.
forgiveness
patience, prayers
eat 2-gether every day. and make sure ur good in the bed. that simple